Repentance Paradox!

[Rachel Gerrard]

I have been recognising many paradoxes in the way God is working with me - things that seem contradictory or odd on the outside, but when looked at deeper, turn out to be His perfect, unfathomable Love being made manifest.

I often look at my two year old son and my heart leaps for joy. Then I catch myself and cannot escape thoughts of "he has only been born because of my fornication" and "if I had been a Christian at the time he was conceived - he wouldn't have been conceived at all because I wouldn't have been fornicating!" How can I be so grateful for something that is the result of my sin?? It's all so confusing and I don't know how I should feel!

Fornication is probably the one sin of mine that I feel has been "removed as far as east is from the west". I have been brought into repentance about many other things, but usually as the result of some painful judgement or consequence. So how then can my repentance of fornication be fruitful and genuine when the result of it has been a baby - the first person I have ever truly loved?

He has not given me a son because of my fornication - He has given me a son DESPITE my fornication - the realisation of which makes me turn from the sin even more as my heart responds to the love and forgiveness He has shown me.

Again, just as the realisation about the TRUTH of the reconciliation of all things has drawn me reverently nearer to Him, so have the depths and complexity of His Love for me - a sinner - melted my heart and made me long to please Him.

Lord, I know I must accept with gladness all the consequences of my sin, knowing that you have the whole universe in the palm of Your hand. Thank you for giving me a glimpse of what Your Love for me looks like. Keep waking me up to Your Love, Lord. I don't know how to love You or other people but I want to learn. Please teach me. Amen.

[Marquita Smith]

Rachel,
Amen sister! I too have had to desk with the same. I have two daughters, one from fornication and the second from adultery. And to add to that, a tattoo of a man I thought I was in love with when my husband and I were about to divorce large and clear on my forearm. I see it everyday, and so does my husband. And there have been these times where I said, "Lord, can I even be saved?" And "how can my conscience be cleansed when my eyes continue to remind me?"..

But he gives more grace.

And there is a reminder there, not if the sin, but the grace that saves you from the sin.

What you wrote really encouraged me.

Thank you.

[Paul Cohen]

Amen, ladies! I'm blessed to hear these things. How great and good is the Lord, to turn us from our sins and to work it all out for good while correcting us? All praise and honor to Him!

"Oh that men would praise the LORD for His goodness, and for His wonderful works to the children of men! And let them sacrifice the sacrifices of thanksgiving, and declare His works with rejoicing" (Psalms 107:21-22 KJV).

Paul

[Victor Hafichuk]

Amen! God is blessing you Rachel and Marquita. Know that He's in the business of restoring all things after subjecting them to vanity. Perhaps you may wish to read http://www.thepathoftruth.com/teachings ... f-evil.htm" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; and
http://www.thepathoftruth.com/teachings ... odnews.htm" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

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[Marquita Smith]

Amen he is Victor! I will read them asap! There is so much information and so many lessons, I have been taking them all in, and am thankful I found them and the Lord has shared such wisdom with y'all.

[Victor Hafichuk]

Rachel, concerning your paradoxes, judge nothing after the appearance or before the time. Sabbath peace to you and all!